Ahoy Mates, I, Grand Poobah, being of relatively sound mind and body do herby resolve on this Yew Years Eve to produce the following boards in 2004: GREEN FLASH: this is the $34.00 off-the-rack fiberglass paipo that I mentioned in a previous e-mail. I neglected to mention that it came from a restaurant supply. Yes, it’s a tray. The standard model is a 34 inch oval shape with steel-reinforcement built into the rail . Some flex, but not too much. Not like those little 14X18 polyethylene trays that the groms like to ride. It also comes stock with a non skid deck that can withstand the high temperatures of commercial dishwashers. A surface mount leash attachment cost $5.00 extra. But still, at $39.00 the Green Flash is competitively priced compared to department store sponges. I already have the basic model. In 2004 I resolve to test several other variants of the tray paipo with fins and runners. CARPETBAGGER: this will be the first in a series of paipos in the OC Matrix Class. The OC stands for “old carpet.” Yes, you read that correctly. Old carpeting is the number one component in Gotham’s main landfill, and the Commissioner has been after me to make something out of it. It was actually his suggestion to make paipos out of the stuff. I currently have several yards of old carpet in the back of my truck. LAZARUS: this will be another “Junkyard Wars” approach to paipo construction where I recycle some of the old trifin thrusters that cluttering up Gotham’s landfill. A complete reshape makes for a rather narrow board. The Lazarus Class boards will use nose blocks, tail blocks and minimal glassing for a quick-to-water paipo process. WONDER WOMAN: a nearly invisible and bulletproof paipo made from clear lexan plastic. We need these for our local malitia. They will be neutrally buoyant for scuba approaches to point breaks. JETHRO: Okay. It’s not a board. It’s a variant of the old hillbilly surf mat. But not just an inner tube shoved into a burlap sack. I plan to do things to the sack to make a rockered surf craft out of Jethro. Maybe add a drink holder and a compass just in case I get swept out to sea. PAPILLON: this will be a hybrid surf mat similar in appearance to Jethro, but using oiled coconuts for flotation rather than an inner tube. I’m curious to see how well the coconuts conform to the wave chop. TOO TALL JONES: this will be my first handboard mini paipo. I’m not even sure yet what I want to make it out of. But I do know that it’ll be at least sixteen and one quarter inches long. That way Mr. Jones will be too tall to be allowed in a Red Wings handboard competition, but not too tall to hang with the locals at Kailua. As usual in 2004 I plan to fart in the general direction of the rule makers. Happy New Year, Larry O’Brien Grand Poobah http://www.sk8.org/team/aquarius.html