Paddle out protocol? And prayers please.

General Discussion
1

As some of you are aware one of my best friends passed away just after New Years. His brother is organizing the memorial for this coming Saturday and today I got a call asking me if I knew what exactly to do during the paddle out. I’ve never been to one so I had no clue. Can anyone enlighten me so I can pass on the information? I know his brother will be pretty distraught and I’m not sure he’ll be able to speak. I’m thinking everyone just goes out and says a word or two?

On another heavy note, my brother in law went in for an exploratory surgery that was expected to last 3 hours. He was under for 11. They removed part of his pancreas and doudema (sp?). Any good thoughts or prayers would be appreciated.

2

thoughts and good vibes going out.

the one I went to was something like:

  • main speaker gets everyone settled in with an opening comment

  • moment of silence

  • free for all…go around the circle with a (surfing) story or good memory of the fallen

  • prayer if it suits you

  • big cheer…everyone kind of hooted and hollered…building louder and louder…it was actually pretty cathartic.

  • all share waves in

3

the one for Ben Shipman we brought leis and flowers, and near the end placed them on the water to float away…

4

We couldn’t get the flowers so we wrote our names and private thoughts-prayers with theirs in the sand where the high tide meets the land.

It was a heavy mix and blend of eternal and temporal.

edit for clarity: the action above helped me on togetherness and letting go. I imagine the waves lappin the sand thousands of miles away often. it really helped.

godspeed l-bel

5

Family lobster sending up love bubbles for your brother.

For the paddle out…sometimes deceased board with flowers or burning lei is in the centre of circle all holdhands for silent thoughts and finish by all wildly splashing water toward the board.

Aother had small plastic film canisters with deceased ashes and everyone got one and at end of circle session spread the ashes some as they rode wave as a way of sharing a last wave.

You will be OK, friendship will prevail.

6

The one for my friend Frank went like this:

Main speaker spoke of the importance and meaning of Frank’s life and what he meant to all that knew him.

Everyone in the circle told a short story.

We all rode waves in Frank’s memory.

Sure do miss that guy.

7

The paddle out done for our young surfers who died was like the above. Their ashes were taken out to the deep water. Poured into the inner circle. Close friends and relatives dove through the ashes first. Then the rest dove and swam through the ashes as they sank and the current took them away. Pretty cool. Mike

8

i am sorry to hear of your loss llilibel. i hope everything goes well for the paddleout. i don’t really have anything significant to share, but i reckon with grief it’s important to allow yourself to do what is natural for you. personally, i think a lot of yelling & splashing & loud crying & shared waves & recounting tales over a few drinks is a good way to go.

once again, i’m sorry mate.