Those silly Australians

http://www.tracksmag.com/winstuff_show.php?id=1

on the radar …the threatned establishment instigates divisive ‘captions’ perhaps ridicule to further establish their unstable place in the ever changing hierarchy.while conning the unsuspecting to reveal themselves to their private data base to eventually exploit when the “surf Industry” colapses in a heap at their feet in the presense of superior waterbourne species…want a pair of trunks? that must be promoted to viable product status? we have invested a great deal in the hopes that we can…sell them…please…one pair free…whoopie…ambrose…thats the picture ? wheres the hot one? you know the one in the gaping tube? with the dry haired innerspace alien life form formerly adapted to the mail room at Young and Rubicam…the caption for that one is …“all I could think of was the theory of relativity in the mail room ,here all I think about is folding space”…QUANTUM SHIFT

DITO!!! well said Los Ambrose.Im just headed out for a low tide session with Matt on our mats.We dont need no stinking trunks.

yeahhhh, from now on im just gonna skip all of ambroses posts because they make no sense, but its probably just cause im stupid

Quote:

yeahhhh, from now on im just gonna skip all of ambroses posts because they make no sense, but its probably just cause im stupid

It ain’t about smarts - it’s about reading in color. Vitamin L is probably a good point of reference. Matt and Kirk hopefully will take some monster multivitamins if they’re going out in SoCal today - God really flushed the toilet for the first time in something like 180 days and the street gutters look like a 1970 vintage rainbow spray job on a 6’9"" rounded pintail.

I was running errands in the rain this morning, since I didn’t feel any compulsion to contaminate the latest facial skin fry with some emerging amoeba for muddy surf, and was pondering the other Ambrosian thread and thinking about how it might have been nice to have taken up a complementary activity to surfing, like music or art, which one could not only continue to do but actually get better and better at as they age in this real world. FM public radio station I had on in the truck played this old Bob Dylan song while I was driving slow in muddy sheets of water next to a head high lemon orchard…probably didn’t look cool but felt that way. Saw this thread when I got back, thought I’d share, pass it along really. People who get a kick out of riding mats, or want to, will probably get the feeling…A Poem For Pedestrian Surfing.

It ain’t no use to sit and wonder why, babe

It don’t matter, anyhow

An’ it ain’t no use to sit and wonder why, babe

If you don’t know by now

When your rooster crows at the break of dawn

Look out your window and I’ll be gone

You’re the reason I’m trav’lin’ on

Don’t think twice, it’s all right

It ain’t no use in turnin’ on your light, babe

That light I never knowed

An’ it ain’t no use in turnin’ on your light, babe

I’m on the dark side of the road

Still I wish there was somethin’ you would do or say

To try and make me change my mind and stay

We never did too much talkin’ anyway

So don’t think twice, it’s all right

It ain’t no use in callin’ out my name, gal

Like you never did before

It ain’t no use in callin’ out my name, gal

I can’t hear you any more

I’m a-thinkin’ and a-wond’rin’ all the way down the road

I once loved a woman, a child I’m told

I give her my heart but she wanted my soul

But don’t think twice, it’s all right

I’m walkin’ down that long, lonesome road, babe

Where I’m bound, I can’t tell

But goodbye’s too good a word, gal

So I’ll just say fare thee well

I ain’t sayin’ you treated me unkind

You could have done better but I don’t mind

You just kinda wasted my precious time

But don’t think twice, it’s all right

"… The boys aboard the boat were stoked when they turned up to this break and watched flawless lefts peeling across the reef. While everyone pulled out fresh surfboards and started waxing up, Dave Rastovich saw a perfect opportunity to whip out the surf mat and start attacking the waves on his belly. Just what is Rasta thinking?

So get cracking people, the funniest / most creative caption will win the Rip Curl STL boardies…"

Thanks Parker! I can hardly wait to see the captions… many Aussies seem to have a special knack for grody humor :slight_smile:

Ahh Yes, TRACKS. As the Kiwis would say - “once were warriors” and on the cutting edge no just a monomaniac magazine for grommets. The once veritable magazine has seems to have closed its collective mind on their original theme from the early 70s which was “to celebrate the riding of waves”. These days they think if you aren’t riding a 6’2" thruster you don’t rate. They lost my subscription decades ago.

All things surfing being equal, i.e. whichever way one chooses to surf is as valid as anyone else’s choice of wave tool, deriding a method of surfing does not reflect so much on “de” rider, y’all, as on the derider. It might be better to award a prize to the caption that best praises the surfer, both indivdual and generic, for having the spirit to seek his own adventure.

Well said Ambrose. I could think of nothing but what great fun he was having on the Neumatic.

tomas

The link won’t work for me but mat riding has a pretty honourable lineage, George Greenough, Peter Crawford, even Dan Merkel used to ride a couple on his way in from a photo session!

I hear what you`re saying…

Tracks Mag used to be respectfully open to a variety of surfcraft and their builders/riders. As I recall, some excellent in-depth writing and photos.

In the late 1970`s, Tracks Mag featured George Greenough in a multi-page article w/photos, personally evaluating over a dozen different types of surf mats!

Would anything like that be published today?

tracks, surfing life, and waves…

good photos occassionally, but more often than not ruined by inane captions, dolly and cosmopolitan style layout and articles, and in reality, piece of shit publications pandering to kids.

tracks, surfing life and waves…

in no way representative of what goes on away from the pro ho tour and sponsored pretty boy surf trips.

tracks, surfing life and waves…

ask yourself, what is the average age they target in their articles ? seen many articles on surfers over the age of 25 there lately, other than as a source of derision ?

Wayne Lynch said it well... 

“surfing has been around a long time. It’s heritage and history is rich. It is not just some teenybopper activity.”

It's about time the magazines realised that. 





I wish we got The Surfers Journal here...and other quality publications which put a bit of thought, originality, effort and insight into their articles and layout. "Surfing World" in past years certainly did that, and still shows flashes of greatness. One gets the feeling they are targeting a more mature market. 

Please, nobody out there assume that ‘tracks’, ‘surfing life’ , and ‘waves’ are in any way ,shape, or form accurately representing surfing in Australia from any big picture perspective…or even want to.

Judging us by these crappy rags would be like me going and living in huntington beach all summer, and using that as my basis for what America is all about… "like, w-e-e-e-i-r-d, d-u-u-u-u-d-e "! [know what I’m saying ?]

     "chip"

Hey Nels thanks for that post , cool.Dylan is one of our favorites. Just got back and Matts and my eyes are burning a bit . We were out there skimin bumpin rails and laughing like two kids . Dale thanks for the Ride.Ill probably be glowing in the dark tonight.

chipfish, the day of the surf magazine is gone and personally I find the “serious” ones almost as offensive as the teenybopper/mensmag types. Surfing as a culture is dead and gone, it was a historical moment that a few of us were priveleged to share, now it is just another part of mass culture and is beyond revival.

The essential thing was that there were so few of us and so many waves. It was a non-conformist thing, being a surfer was not very acceptable and, if you were serious, required some real sacrifices, now everybody does it, the only sacrifice is if they can’t get to the Mentawais this year…all gone boys, you’re all out there chasing a dream !

The thing I like about the Aussie surf rags are the pictures of the chicks. Does anyone over the age of 14 read any of the surf rags? U.S. or other? OK,I do read SJ. Its all eye candy. Go to the super market and look at the pictures. I wish there were more Aussie surf rags here. Beautiful T and A that our rags are too politically correct to show.

Blindboy, Surfing is dead? Not for me. I’ve been at it for over 30 years(not that you could tell by the way I surf). I’m usually out there with kids that could easily be my children(what was your mother’s name?). I’m just as stoked now as I was when I caught my first wave. So the boards have changed and its more crowded. Adapt and go with it. Sounds like sour grapes to me. The old"it just doesn’t get as good as it used to," attitude. There are still plenty of funny charactors. I thank God after every surf because I am still healthy and fit enough to continue knowing that the number of days I have already surfed is probably much greater than the number of days I have left to surf. I’m saving for a mat. Later. Mike

Not surfing rooster…surf culture, the idea that surfing is some kind of identity or has some communal element. I’ve been surfing for forty years now and I’m still out there at every chance but I wouldn’t waste my time on surf magazines or videos…I mean if you want porn, buy porn!

Man ,you picked a good name.I know what your sayin but you gotta just pick your days and make the best of it.

“Imagination (dreaming of what might be) is more important than knowledge (what has already been).” Albert Einstein

Every paddle out is a new dream.

Hi Blindboy,

I don’t know about surfing as an identity. I try not to get boxed into that type of corner. The “what I do is who I am.” But, there is still a surf culture. It may bore you or be too contrite and adolescent in nature,but its there. Communal is right here on this web site. I went to the Swaylock’s gathering this Fall and it was a pretty communal seen. The thing I don’t like about porn and the reason I don’t buy porn is because it leaves nothing to the imagination. Know what I mean? Just show a bit of this or that and I’ll fill in the blanks. MIke

Also the Aussie mags i have to put up with don’t really cater for anything else but either your standard Thruster or Mal. Nothing terribly different IE. Single Fins, Fish ETC.

ASL (surfing life) Is the best of a bad bunch.

and Ben, I saw your letter in an old issue of waves. about the ‘fish test’ they ran.

I find that the best magazine is Swaylocks.com or Surfermag Forums.

Josh.