Birthday special SUP revenge model

I have gotten really frustated with a influx of KOOKS on SUP’s who are coming to some of my favorite surf spots. They are rude and inconsiderate and keep picking off the wave I have been waiting over 50 yrs for. Their attitude is that sooner or later everybody wiill be riding SUP’s so get used to it. So I made this so I can catch waves early paddle fast and yet still be able to SURF it like a surfboard instead of a flailing idiot trying to control an oversized barge.  I made this for my  birthday it does what I want it to do, actually surfs really well, and do not need no stinkin paddle. It is 8’11" long 24" wide 17 1/2" nose 17" tail 3-3/4" thick. EPS/epoxy shaped from a custom designed blank. I am OLD 6’3" 230lbs…

 

bitchin board ace

…ambrose…

make one 12’ long

with lotsa rocker throughout

so you can out manuver

the fat railed waz SUP s

Hey Ace, Hope you had a happy birthday.

Sharkcountry

 

 

Ace - that is a very cool solution to an aggravating problem!  Never tried one, but it seems like SUP’s are great for lakes and rivers, or exploring the coastline, but don’t know why they would take one out an established surfing spot with surfers out.

You went wide and thick but kept the length down, made it a single fin.

Looks like a fun board, you’re stoked on the ride, how great to have a plan come together!

I have made bigger boards that would do the job but the goal was to keep this one under 9’. I can knee paddle it properly too. Very loose and responsive I made a 1/2" fin adjustment and found it. So far GOOOOOOOOAL. And I do not have to make those weird floppy back cut backs that SUP,s do.

one of my favorite spots, that I have enjoyed sup-free for 35 years; one that is fun for knee high waves, is lately becoming a kook-sup-flail zone as well, & I have thought of a suitable board that would level the playing field, as I am getting tired of having to explain to these selfish, entitled, inconsiderate and incompetent fleas that you can’t just circulate around both the inside **and ** outside zone just to spastically paddle for the one everyone else has waited patiently for -yours is a nice solution Ace! - please let us have some rider feedback on it, it sounds like a paddler for sure!

Ace,

You are my hero.

Happy Birthday young man!

Now take back your wave!

Very frustrated with the SUP thing.  Day before yesterday it was about 40* out and I took my son surfing about two hours before dark.  We had a little peak to ourselves with inconsistant thigh to waist high waves coming through.  We had also noticed that the next beach over was also good and completely empty as well.  After about half an hour of the two of us hooting each other into the frigid little waves…not one…not two…but 3 guys show up on SUPs.  Instant buzz kill as these guys swarmed and towered over us sweeping their way franticly into every available scrap.  They couldn’t have walked the extra 50 yards and paddled out on the other side of the jetty where they could have had just as good waves, they had to fark up our session.  After about 15 minutes of frustration my son and I were the ones to move over to the next beach down to get away from them.

If you want to use a SUP to head to unsurfed mysto spots or cruise the coastline go for it. Where I am there is very limited space and it is already crowded enough with surf schools dumping 30 beginners at a time combined with rentals and Costco sponge boarders add a few SUPers that can not control the beasts and a couple more that think every wave is theirs turns SURFING into something I do not recognize.  There are some pretty well known reef break spots south that WERE where you went when you earned it that are being taken over by SUPers most of em I have never seen before but they seem to think that just because they can catch the wave further out than everybody else the wave is theirs over and over again…SUP’s are the latest cash cow for some shops I have heard shop owners telling new potential SUPers, that do not even know how to surf, that if they get a SUP they can catch waves further out than the “surfers” bla bla off they go. We have a guy that can barely control his mamoth beast that has a motor installed in his SUP and uses the motor to catch waves, isn’t that the same as a jetski? Or a Boat? Motorized jet skis and boats are not allowd in the surf here so this should be banned also. This is why I have started riding a mat, get the whole swimming area to myself and plenty of overhead waves.

 Ride report…Simple it does what I wanted it to do.

fkn love it!

this was mine i bought to fight the hanalei sup epidemic

a used uncleD board shaped by andrus inspired by joe blair’s work

left it on kauai with PPK

b1

 

b2

How to clean out the lineup  Paddle out and then in aload clear voice say " Anyone driving a Black SUV?" " Thought I saw someone trying to jimmy the Locks on one." All The those with a SUP that cost Over $1,500 will be out of the water in no time. 

I agree that SUPs are a menace and need to be controlled somehow. I do find it amusing though that longboarders who’ve basically been doing exactly the same thing to shortboarders for the last 20 years or so are now getting a taste of their own medicine. The bottom line is that people need to have some thought for other people in the water. Dragging a boat out into the lineup and catching every single wave is selfish and shows a lack of thinking.

We are circulating a petition to get the SUP-Snipers Act of 2014 on the ballot.

Basically this law, when passed, will allow anyone who is verifiably CORE (no maggots or other debris) to pick off SUP’s with a sniper rifle. A points system will be enforced with various prizes awarded. Most points will be awarded for expert marksmanship such as disabling the paddling hands, destroying paddles or kneecaps, or cleanly slicing through legropes. In the spirit of fairness, negative points will be assessed for causing non-surfing (if you can call that surfing) oriented injuries which inconvenience the victim but do not interfere with their SUPping, and of course for causing fatalities, which will result in heavy negative point deductions. Although we believe in strict penalties for piloting such abominations near surfers, swimmers, children frolicking in the shorebreak, or cute little dogs, we do not believe it should be a capital offense.

Please do your part and sign the petition when it circulates at a beach near you.

P.S. we also request that you DO NOT support our competitors bill - the “Burn SUP’s at the Stake” act of 2014 which will undoubtedly fail. We concede that they should receive points for creativity: (they specify that the paddle will be used as a stake and the SUPper’s leg rope will be used to tie them to it - flammable materials to be made of old school polyester resin and catalyst - unmixed, and that the guilty party is to be wrapped in 2 layers of 7.5 oz Volan before combustion - they even suggest UV catalyst as a form of torture). Clearly a lot of thought has gone into the punishment-fits-the-crime aspect. Nonetheless, we also understand that this abomination and scourge upon the earth is the result of selfishness and ignorance, rather than malice (at least in most cases), and we don’t feel that such shortcomings of character are grounds for capital punishment, no matter how creative the means of execution might be. For these reasons we urge a NO vote on the proposed Burn SUP’s at the Stake act.

Complete details are in our manifesto. Cheers!

 

 

Here in Hawaii there’s a bunch of older guys, the retired age guys, who stopped surfing because they couldn’t compete against the younger ones on longboards or the even younger ones on short boards. Now with the SUPs they can catch waves again and they are getting their revenge. Kinda hard to get mad about because they were pushed out for a while. Sad statement of what things can become, but it’s life. Same for tough guys, once you get too old to be the toughest guy you will get your share of all the shit you gave to others. Lots of friends trying to get me to move to SUP, but I’m still holding out. Still like shorter boards over really long boards, but the time is coming when I’ll have to make the move. The guys that started long ago are ripping, and they can surf as well as anyone.

You can’t stop SUPs from hitting your spots, the ocean belongs to everyone. Just keep the idiots from hurting others, and the a-holes from getting their way. That takes a unified group, and unfortunately will ultimately lead to violence.

We should always respect our old time surfers first. Don’t matter if they aren’t as good as they once were. They are the ones that got us stoked on surfing. If they were a-holes and caused a lot of trouble to others, then maybe they deserve some payback. We’ll all be old one day, hopefully still surfing and still be able to get waves. Maybe by then the wave pools will be perfected and we can score perfect waves for an hour with a senior discount.

I make a point of dropping in on any SUPs that invade my local spots. I look them right in the eye while doing so. If and when they complain I tell them “You are using a boat and a paddle. You have no rights out here.”

There’s been many times when the SUP types were half my age, yet I catch more waves on my 8’0 noserider than they do. I do everything I can to discourage, annoy, and out right ridicule them whenever possible. They are a plague.

I would love to see more of this!

I do the same thing.  However, I usually only have to deal with it when I am longboarding as they tend to stay away from most shortboard spots I frequent.  The problem is that so many other longboarders are siting out there and having a conversation rather than surfing so oftentimes I am the only one fighting the good fight against the plague.

At the spots I normally surf we’ve been holding steady at no more than maybe 2-3 SUPs at a time and those guys tend to move around a lot.  I really have no beef with that. 

But yeah, there is some irony involved when longboarders complain about SUPs taking undue advantage.    Getting your waves is cool but getting everyone else’s waves in addition is just being greedy.  

haha, I find irony in a different place: the shortboarders who used to whine and complain about longboarders, and are now finding out how good they had it LOL!

Of course, I’ll be the first to say, long or short, we all gotta share.  I just don’t think paddle boats belong in a lineup with surfboards - but I have no problem with them filling up the lakes, rivers, and non-surfing beaches.

cool board ace

no one likes someone SUP surfing near them mostly for the fear of being hit by one

they offer great access to out of the way spots that have no people / are not suitable for traditional surfing and thats the most fun place to take them

easy - if there are SUP surfers (or any other surfers you dont like for that matter) near, either paddle away or hoot for them then get the wave after them. or do like ace and out paddle them with your badass one of a kind surfboard and your arms

if i SUP surf i typically go off the beaten path and catch waves alone

 

SUPs aren’t the problem…

its the people who use them that CAN be (but not always)

its the people who market and sell them to those people

its the people who don’t  EDUCATE those that don’t know any better

or REGULATE the ones that do

somehow we’ve all become whining sheep in the lineup

there are still places that know what to do when and if it needs to be done