First Ever Annual Fat Penguin StoryFest: Roast

Hi, one and all whether or dither you’ve ever had a bad experience with a Fat Penguin Surfboard or not. We invite you to the First Ever ‘Annual Fat Penguin StoryFest’:Roast This is a weeklong event starting Sunday 2/22/2004 lasting through 2/29/2004…depending on the success of this event it may turn into a Monthly or Even Year-long Celebration. To those of you who can’t wait till Sunday, we offer an exemption --post at will! All postings must either be ‘true’ stories relating to the Fat Penguin or lacking a true story you can offer up snide remarks, jokes and insults. Use your creativity. All postings will be regarded as ‘True Stories’ for the GrandPrize. First Place: ‘Grand Prize’:‘Fat Penguin Casting’ from TubeDog’s Dog. Second Place will be a suitably framed P. Cole Surfboard Industry Resume. Third place will be a gift certificate for a T.E. Fat Penguin Surfboard Plan. Fourth Place: we’ve recovered 7 FP Surfboards in varying condition, this is the Last Place Losers Prize. Post away with those ‘Truthful Stories’.

I had a FP, whenever I walked on the sand to the water, everyone would laugh at me. Later I found out why, the board didnt do dittly. Now the guys at Pipeline dont laugh at me anymore I got me a Hawaiian Island Creations Truster. I’m there friend and I buy them beer. No more ‘Haole Penguin Boy’ comments. Life is Cool and so are the Tubes.

I think this thread is in poor taste. The Fat Penguin guy designed a board that is very different. True, his enthusiasm may have gotten in the way a few times, however he did put out the effort to do something unique. The board may work for all we know. Maybe it won’t. Most people are afraid to think diffrent and be diffrent than everyone else, they would like to but are afraid of what others would think of them. TW

take it somewhere else

Now boys what ever you say, right or wrong with the words FAT PENGUIN anywhere is only making my day…keep saying it over and over…I dont mind one bit. She`ll be right mate ! http://www.geocities.com/wunderboyi/ninetysixpercent.html

fucking dickhead

I had a custom board shaped (Sydney) a few weeks ago–top shaper, I brought up the FatPenguin topic just to get the shapers thoughts or ideas on the topic…all he did was laugh it off, topic not discussed…I dont think he thought to highly of it.

Doubt if he`d even seen one in person…Aquatic gliders wrap the fluid over a lifting body…I doubt there would be 1000 people in the world that can understand this principle…“Lifting Body”…But its very surfable ! Hands up any one who has even heard of “G&S and Surfboards Australia” chapter…very significant era of surf design in Australia…Paul Cole was a major part of it… http://www.geocities.com/wunderboyi/ninetysixpercent.html

Flounder is that you?What are you doing in Australia?Son, drunk fat and stupid is no way to go through life.

I love the smell of Napalm in the lineup.Get me my Yater Spoon before the wind switches and leave that Fat Penguin in the Chopper.Charlie don’t surf and neither does that board.

I’ve been riding my fat penguin for the last month. I’ve noticed he gets pretty tired carrying me to work. For $50 they said they would send me a diet that would increase his energy. And those animal activists,you would think I was clubing a baby seal or something.

how fast is the fastest submarine ,in comparison to the fastest surface planeing hull??? even a russian built nuclear reactor doesnt get the sub pumping,no where near as fast as te can pump a penguin… ps obviously tw isnt a professional board builder … i just had a brilliant thought why dont they use the fat penguin as a draft plan for submarines ,those high budget scientists might actually fall for it , i can see te and paul cole now ,at the helm of there new sub …

Personally I feel this thread is a waste of space…

I’ve seen the kids on the Fat Penguins, on little dwark ponies also.

Foamdust, with greatest respect since you deserve it, if this thread can eliminate the board-clogging, annoying, self-admitted spamming of every other thread by this FP pusher character, then it will return to a better two-way, design dialogue that we know and love. If it takes shaming this guy, I say OK. I don’t know if he can be shamed. He seems like he’s the kind of conceited know-it-all obnoxious jerk who tries to insert himself into every group at parties, maybe trying to sell them insurance or something they don’t want to talk about, and repeatedly tell him such, and repeatedly the groups get turned off fast and move away to their own discussion again. At parties, though, we can walk away and go back to reasoned discussions. On a board like this, he can (and does)repeatedly pop up and endlessly push his annoying pitch. Remember, he wants diversion, and like the typical salesman of schlocky stuff, readily admitts he prefers bad publicity rather than none. Sad.

dive, dive dive. 0 0 o o O o . . surfacing might be a problem, though.

There are always different ways to skin a cat… After the WWII mounds of data from manauvers and other sorties was collected and studied. They the researchers wanted to know it all… All sorts of proceedure were invented and trialed including A-bombs… Its my opinion that the research into LIFTING BODIES was an exercise in building orbitaly storable delivery vehicles… The idea behind LIFTING BODIES is that the craft has no wings, instead it uses its entire shape to create lift like a wing… So you very well can have a platform in orbit with 10-20 of these lifting bodies loaded with nuclear material ready to just drop back into and out of orbit re-enter the atmoshpere and guide itself to any target on the surface of the planet. Ive never known american GOVT to spend mega bucks for a peacfull reason, although the principle of lifting bodies is important the application is still menacing. Ive attatched acouple of URL to show some examples of LIFTING BODIES… Official Purpose of LB Lifting Bodies Project Summary A fleet of lifting bodies flown at the NASA Flight Research Center (FRC), Edwards, Calif., from 1963 to l975 demonstrated the ability of pilots to maneuver (in the atmosphere) and safely land a wingless vehicle. These lifting bodies were basically designed so they could fly back to Earth from space and be landed like an aircraft at a pre-determined site. (In 1976 NASA renamed the FRC as the NASA Dryden Flight Research Center in honor of Hugh L. Dryden.) Im no expert at anything and Im not interested in being one…Ill just share the information and be happy with that… The idea behind LIFTING BODIES is that the craft has no wings, instead it uses its entire shape to create lift like a wing… So you very well can have a platform in orbit with 10-20 of these lifting bodies loaded with nuclear material ready to just drop back into and out of orbit re-enter the atmoshpere and guide itself to any target on the surface of the planet. Ive never known americans GOVT to spend mega bucks for a peacfull reason, although the principle of lifting bodies is important the application is still menacing. Ive attatched acouple of URL to show some examples of LIFTING BODIES http://www.dfrc.nasa.gov/gallery/photo/M2-F2/HTML/ECN-1436.html http://www.dfrc.nasa.gov/gallery/photo/M2-F2/Small/ECN-1088.jpg http://www.geocities.com/wunderboyi/ninetysixpercent.html

old concept already commercially used…its called the Space Shuttle numnuts! you know less than whats on the History Channel. Anyhow, I bought a Fat Penguin its a piece of shit! I tell everyone not to buy them.

… where do you think NASA got most of its funding over the years? The American Govt.! I thought you were just tenatious, but you slipped with that typical leftists “evil American govt.” crap. Do me a favor, I won’t bust on your country if you don’t bust on mine … don’t bother with a return diatribe, no one wants to hear it … here he comes, …oh no! HELP! AMBROSE!!!

Its not all about Shuttle my friend more to do with NASP…the shuttle is 70s flow form…theres a bit more too it, in its next application, PRESSURE WAVE GLIDERS than there is in the Shuttle…these craft are supposedly the forunners for the next generation space vehicles…that travel on hypersonic pressure waves created by controlled atomic explosion drives… This is just an execise of comparitve aplications of LIFTING BODIES, USAF re-entry vehicles, delivery vehicles, space vehicles…FP surfboards… Everything in the FP is used in industry but untill 1991 it hadnt be assembled to redefine surfhulls…Fluid Gliders work and can be surfed beyond the normal limits of conventional planing hulls. Warduv if you purchased a FP you would have given me some sort of email describing your negative experience…If you are serious about making a smear on FP, photo copy your reciept post it here at SWBB and you will achive full effect of your flandering remarks…although I have the feeling you are not going too! The old “what if” sydrome, can he realy back it up everybody? Another example of insecurity why is Warduv threated if there is no substance to my diatribe… I belive GOvts of any kind with too much power are corruptable my govt is in my opinion foolish for endevouring to recieve Trade benifits for going to a war where the evidence had to be fabricated to sway the people to agree…And should be the wealthyest for all the ingenious inventions, but no… Carl Sagan was my insight to US govt reason behind many public and expensive projects, he called them simply “Smoke sceens” to justify budgets and expectations of investors and the people of not just America but the World… I just happen to agree. There is infact a global competition to make space commercialy viable(NASA FAILED MISERABLY), the cheapest ride into orbit and back…it will be intersting to see what comes out of it and how much so called budget and technology the competitors employ… It takes an entire town 30,000 to support and deploy a single shuttle…not bad if you have a bunch of towns going down the gurgler, givem a space shuttle each! http://www.geocities.com/wunderboyi/ninetysixpercent.html