http://surfeurope.mpora.com/features/news/surfboard-model-namer-runs-out-of-names.html
For those in the industry, this is even funnier. Another reason why I don’t like “models” and standardized shapes.
They omitted a bit of the “Klons” family history; It runs in the family. His father used to name paint colors for Sherwin-Williams, Glidden and a whole stable of paint manufacturers. Remember “Swiss Coffee”, “Navajoe” or “Bone White”.?? “Klon” Senior was the man back in the day.
Is this like something you’d find on the onion?
BTW…what’s a “plane shape”?
Yes it is a satire, and very well done.
I think “plane shape” is a typo for plain shape. And yes, that’s satire also.
I think it might a typo for “plan shape”?
I see the same mistake written in this forum, a lot.
ha ha!
but, for a true story…
I knew a young lady who worked for a branding company, pretty fresh out of college.
She thought “altria” would be a good name.
So did Philip Morris.
For this she “only” netted a low six figure bonus (so I was told.).
Not that she strictly needed it, she was fairly well off I believe.
Also knew of a local millionaire who won a million dollar lottery.
In the eighties, when a milllion dollars was, oh never mind…
Thanks for the funny story!!
These clowns in my town decided they wanted to be surfboard guys.
The first model I saw was called " Therapist".
Only problem was how they spaced the lettering.
It actually read “The Rapist”
Pretty bad.
I was listening to guy on public radio talk about how people don’t want custom stuff, they just want a choice, or a model. Kind of made sense “sheeple” don’'t want custom they want a model, and that can explain what’s been happening on the board side for quite some time. Really how many of you consider yourselves original thinkers, and if so, what was your last original thought? Do you utilize your original thoughts daily, or do you just respond to how you have been subtly programmed, and manipulated?
Many of us are operating on a “Pack Mentality”. Just one of Pavlovs’ dogs.
Current human consciousness represents 4 million years of cumulative socio-cultural programming.
We are taught how and what to see, hear, feel, smell, taste and think. It has already been interpreted for us over millions of years.
Nice one, Bud!
Oh where are the days of “The Deadly Flying Glove”?
There’s an outfit out of NJ that seems to be nothing more than importers of Chinese goods, called “Physix”. They had a model called the Newton (after Sir Isaac) but they inexplicably used a pic of Albert Einstein as the image for that model.
Then, there’s this. Why a picture of Humphrey Bogart? Damned if I know!
Remember Windansea Surfboards? The models were named after cigars. Cheroot, panatella, etc.
Bob White (later to become WRV) had a great idea around 1969. Model names had gotten pretty out there by that time, so he just numbered the different shapes he offered.
Late 68-early 69.
First pic…Corky and Ralph Parker with a DFG in the righthand corner
Second pic, a psychedelic ad typical of the time
Third, a pic of the design
LOL that you guys are turning this into a retro-fest.
The WRV ads were pretty out there in their time. The boards would be considered barking dogs today, but nobody knew what the hell they were doing during that period. More ridiculously unfunctional boards were made during that 1968-1970 period than any other time in modern history. Also funny that I ended up working for WRV much later. Fun company to work with, good crew from top to bottom.
Back then, the tiniest board I’d seen in 1969 was a Bob White that had down, hard rails all the way around and it was well under 7’. It was owned by one of the hottest guys in Newport, RI. But, the guy could surf any damn board and make it work.
I was ridng a 6’9" Sopwith Camel then and many friends thought my board was too short!
My first board that I actually owned was a 6’10" Daytona in June of 68, it was considered radically short. Which made it really cool to my teenage brain. Unfortunately, the board had no rocker and the thickest point was right at the fin box. It was a pearling machine. I learned how to swim quite well that summer.
Oh shit, you guys sucked me into the retro-fest. Can’t we talk about how funny the modern model names are?