best is to piss in your full suit before you get in the water, or right after you get out.
make sure it collects in one leg, so it looks like a water balloon. then, go up to the shithead that’s been burning you all day, and kick your piss at him. then run.
Methinks Swaylocks has jumped the shark:-)
So Paul [“silly”] …
I figure with your surname , you’d be the one to ask …
WHAT do you think of my “butt bazooka” idea …
I figure if you made one , and let rip , you’d be firing “Canon balls”, eh ? [or , is that , “a smoking Canon ?” ]
We’ve been having a lot of red tide lately, but after reading this thread I’m beginning to wonder…damn you guys why don’t we all just hold it in!
you know what they say [about farts , at least ] …
"better an empty apartment , than a bad tennant …
although that said , sometimes , as you “empty the apartment " [?'compartment” ?] , there can still be the unsavoury after smell …
Who would have thought a thred about pee-pee, poop, and flatulence. would get so many posts? Good work guys.
Cheers,
Austin
hey nice photo …imagine writing THAT on your tax return …"occupation ? … elephant turd analyst " / pooper scooper …imagine when they get diarrhoea …oh man …
and kick your piss at him. then run.
thats the funniest thing i heard all day
WHAT do you think of my “butt bazooka” idea …
I’m probably going to regret this, but a few years ago someone who shall go nameless emailed me a photo he had taken off surfermag.com of a young surfer…expelling…well, “butt bazooka” is a great term but this was more like a super soaker water gun…I can’t be the only person who saw that who can’t reformat the mental hard drive to get rid of the image…
that must have been before my time there , otherwise I would have remembered and posted that shot here …
wasn’t a "spit the winkle " , was it ??
ben
while we’re on the er "down under topic …
what are some god names people world wide have for “taking a dump” ??
here’s a few of my favourites …
"dropping the kids off at the pool " [I like kids]
“laying a cable”
"bombing the bismarck "
“doing a clean snap”
“taking the drop”
…just to keep it design related , maybe you could tell me
dimensions
rocker
colour
laminating procedures [what chemicals you used]
gloss or dull finshed
any problems selling it
glassons or cistern ?
thank you for your help ......
ben
Who would have thought a thred about pee-pee, poop, and flaglance would get so many posts? Good work guys.
Cheers,
Austin
claasssic !!
flag lancing …a new weapon in the fight by “moral , upstanding citizens” in their tireless fight to rid the world once and for all of the sinister and deadly habit of farting in public places .
I don’t think you would need TOO long a flag pole to discourage ‘repeat offenders’ ??
ben
…up until now , I had only ever heard of ‘lancing a boil’ …
thanks Swaylocks …the things we learn here on a daily basis never cease to AMAZE me !!
"let ‘er ripfish61’
I think it’s the inactivity while waiting for a set that makes many of us want to pee. It’s relative to the degree of your hypothermia. Vasoconstriction creates greater volume pressure in the blood stream. The kidneys pull off excess fluid to reduce the pressure. A full bladder is a place for additional heat loss, so urinating will help conserve heat. Just be sure to drink plenty of fluids when you get out of the water and warmed up again.
as soon as a friend sent me THIS , I KNEW where it belonged !!!
…could solve shark attack problems for ever …or at least become a front end standin for my formerly mentioned "butt bazooka " ?
http://www.whizzinator.com/index.html
…and with that , I bid myself a restful [and dry] goodnight *…
ben
a picture is worth a thousand words
…mick fanning , after a beer or two too many , methinks !!
" In direct response to rooster’s thread maybe we need to really dig deep …"
yep , REALLY deep !!
which REMINDS me …
DID you hear about the constipated accountant ?
…he worked it out with a pencil …
cheers !
ben [I hope you’re not eating dinner right about now]
just thought some “newbies” needed to see the quality of what has preceded them …
cheers !
ben
was waiting for spit the winkle , only chip would go there …
rumour has it , it was invented in scarborough back in the 60s …
so figured chip would have to be in the know on that one …
why did i read this thread ???
who knows , but some comments really made me laugh …
classic …
only on sways …
regards
BERT
gotta laugh …
my old boss said
"if you don’t laugh , you’ll cry "
ben
…refer to my new avatar , for confirmation …
gotta laugh …
my old boss said
"if you don’t laugh , you’ll cry "
…AND HE SAID THAT RIGHT BEFORE HE FIRED YA RIGHT?
doesnt feel so bad when youre laughing about it…
…bindairdundat
Aloha Nels,
I would disagree with you regarding the use of fecalphobia to clear the lineup…
This little “nugget” was found on Surfline but references a story that ran in the right coast’s Eastrern Surf Magazine:
In the May 2000 issue of Eastern Surf Magazine there is an article titled “Altered States” about surfing from Maine down through Florida. In the section about Virginia, the author mentioned the local rules for Virginia Beach, saying that surfing is restricted to certain times and days, there is mandatory leash use and that one must “pole dump” before catching a wave. We are born and bred Floridians and have been surfing down here for 25-plus years and have never heard of a pole dump. Can you enlighten us? We have numerous folks very curious now! asked by T and B Dawson
First Street fixture and Surfline.com Editor Jason Borte responds:
“It’s not surprising you couldn’t get any clues in Florida, as the answer requires some familiarity of local landmarks, a fair bit of biology and first-hand knowledge of VB’s madcap mentality. Approximately 50 yards beyond the tip of the First Street Jetty, a 15-foot high channel marker denotes the entrance to Rudee Inlet. If a swell is running, waves break not far from the marker, so there’s often a big crowd of surfers nearby. The idea of the pole dump came up around 10 years ago, whereby a surfer scales the pole – it’s not that hard, there’s a ladder – pulls down his or her trunks, hangs the old back end over the railing and infests the lineup with dreaded brown eels, so to speak. Former pro surfer Wes Laine was the first to complete a pole dump, and a few others have followed, but not everyone does it – not even close. One thing’s for sure: a pole dump establishes one’s place in the First Street lineup for eternity. But perhaps more importantly, it disperses the claustrophobic pack for a set or two, guaranteeing the dumper a few easy pickings.”
I believe its a territorial response. such as some wild animals would befoul their kill in order to keep others from getting it so if they cant have no one else can either . now i know for a fact this will clear out a swimming pool in a hurry. so it should work well in the line up also. so the next time its a zoo out there try throwing out some fake turds you know make them out of foam scraps shaped and painted appropriatly maybe even tie 3 or 4 together with some corn nibblets for authenticity. we could make this a demographic experment does poo clear out the tourist or the locals first? what type of poo is most effective a floating pancake, a multicolored or the classic babyruth poo? you see the combinations are almost endless so lets give a try and report back next week . cheers